Christian Coffee Cups

Because of the current controversy around Starbucks’ coffee cups, I thought it was time for some introspection. Before I can look at the speck in their eye, I decided to examine the plank in my own. So, just how Christian were my coffee cups?

I decided a thorough examination was in order so I pulled out every mug I own, photographed it and have ranked them thus:

(In descending order from MOST to LEAST Christian)


This mug has prayer hands, says God bless you and commemorates a church service. It’s a big mug but I’m always afraid to put it in the microwave because of the quasi-metallic paint. No matter what, this is my most sanctified mug.


This mug embodies so much of the ethos I want to claim as a believer. It’s all hand crafted and cool but not afraid to show it’s chips and imperfections in a super authentic way. It also holds lots of coffee, keeps it warm and makes me want to sing The Potters Hand every time I drink from it. Legit.


I got this mug when I graduated from LBC. It used to say a lot more but it flaked off the first time I washed it. There’s some C.S. Lewis levels of allegory going on here…


If you’ve ever wondered what it would look like to see Jesus next to the Statue of Liberty while Kate Smith sings God Bless America, Roadside America is your place. This mug recalls the good old day when men wore trousers, a woman’s work was in the home and everyone wanted a piping hot cup of Sanka.


Wayne works here and he loves Jesus. My dad worked here and he’s with Jesus. This probably should have rated higher.


My mom gave me this mug for Christmas one year when I was working at a super crappy job. Sarcasm is my family’s love language but probably not a spiritual gift…


This mug is from a stupid joke on a podcast. It’s as close to neutral as I’ve got.


I got a little bit tipsy the day I bought this mug, so it will always have a sinful association in my mind. Also, have you seen the tattoos the girl on this show has? What a hussy.


Christians can’t take anti-depressants because Christians can’t be depressed! Just pray it away!


May we all find a way to give half as much grace as we’ve required.

3 Replies to “Christian Coffee Cups”

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